


Never Say Never

by skyblue993



Category: The Fosters (TV 2013)
Genre: (Mpreg), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Angst, Father and son moments, Hard feelings bottled up, It isn't really that angsty, It's honestly a mess, Jonnor - Freeform, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Romance, Smut, Telenovela material, Time Jump, Unplanned Pregnancy, Unresolved Emotional Tension, With my own rules xD, don't read lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-09
Updated: 2017-03-17
Packaged: 2018-10-01 14:42:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10192220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skyblue993/pseuds/skyblue993
Summary: Adam Stevens has Connor's whole life planned, including a mate to marry as soon as College is over forcing Connor to say goodbye to the love of his life, that until life throws a fatal curve ball at him that will rock his whole life to the core.





	1. Chapter 1.

**Author's Note:**

> Few notes:
> 
> -This fic won't be very long! 3 chapters for sure. (It depends on how lazy I get with the length of each chapter lol)  
> -This is ABO verse but some things in this fic may or may not be following ABO Rules. (that explains the tag lol)  
> 

Connor knows who is he supposed to spend the rest of his life with. It's Jude. It has always been Jude, but he also knows it's never going to happen because life, responsibilities and the weight of the presence of Adam Stevens on his back just got into the middle.

 

The only place Connor feels safe to be around Jude is at school but at safe distance from Connor's group of friends who may or may not ambush him and spill every juicy detail about his clandestine rendezvous with Jude to his father.

"I can't do this anymore.." Jude sighs, resting his forehead against Connor. He closes his eyes as their noses brush against each other, the soft breeze of the wind blowing in his hair.

"I know."

Connor knows this is risky, okay? But he also can't bring himself to stay away from Jude. He feels a pull every single day that lures him to the object of his dreams. It's something he owns no control over. It's unreal.

"My father arranged a _“meet the parents”_ dinner with his family."

Jude doesn't say a word. He's heard these things so many times. He just lets out a guttural noise from his throat and then he says quietly, maybe not even meant for Connor to hear, "When's the wedding?"

Connor just wraps his arms tighter around Jude's waist, reveling in the reek of coconut radiating from Jude's soft hair. He's never figured why is he so obsessed with apples flavored shampoo. The thought that he will most likely never know saddens him deeply.

Connor wants to stay like this for the rest of his life, wrapped in Jude's scent and the noises he makes and the way he trembles into his arms because of the fresh breeze and lack of jacket to keep him warm or just because this is probably their last act; The last chapter of their story. _Maybe both._

 

"Who are you going to prom with? " Ashley asks him with a curious look on her face while Stella rushes to answers in his place.

"The big question is _who_ isn't he going to take to prom."

Connor scoffs, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. His gaze miserably starts wandering towards one very familiar direction. His eyes lock with Jude's sitting at the nerd's table, on the very opposite side of the cafeteria. He sees a glimpse of a smile creeping over his lips that manage to hide by giving a bite on his sandwich, who results to be way bigger than his mouth and starts choking on it. Connor's mouth twitches upwards in a smile, amused by the way Jude's face flushes red with embarrassment. The sight manages to make him feel _blessed_ and _doomed_ at the same time.

"I'm probably going to prom alone."

At Connor's admission there's a brief moment of silence falling on the table, then Ashley gasps loudly.  
"Excuse me?! You. Connor Stevens. Prom king--"

"I've not been crowned yet." Connor points out with a smile.

"Yes but--"

"He doesn't necessarily have to go with a date." Stella comments with a knowing, only to Connor's eyes symphatetic, glimpse in her eyes. "We can go together, as friends."

Connor's so thankful to Stella for saving him from the lion's den. "I'd love to"

"You're still bringing me a corsage and I'm expecting you to pick me up with a limousine and all that shit. Okay?"

Connor smiles. That's the least he could do to thank her for being the best friend he could ever wish for.

 

They're sitting all around the big events dinner table at the Stevens's residence. Connor's dad smiles and talks highly of his son to these people as he's trying to advertise a package deal he'd like to sell to the best offer, which is exactly what he's doing by the way; Selling him to the Harringtons' son.

"Connor has always dreamed of going to Berkeley since he was just a kid. His mother--"

Connor's fists clench from beneath the table at the mention of his mother dripping with kindness and respect from Adam's lips.

".. went there to school and always encouraged and inspired _our_ Connor to chase his dreams."

Everyone's awed gaze is now on him as well as his father's eyes severe and expectantly gaze finally deeming him worthy of his attention. He knows that look damn well and means that he's finally been allowed to talk.

"Yeah." He croaks feebly, then his eyes flicker to Adam's face which is visibly tense, his jaw clenched in expectations, his eyes big and warning. "I'm going to Berkeley in the fall."

"That's an average good school." Connor looks at the boy sitting right across from him, his voice high-pitched and filled with proudness as he says, as he hasn't already blown the news all over his social media already. "I've just got my acceptance letter from Princeton."

"Wow, congratulation Preston."

Connor feels a tug in his chest at the way his father's voice fill with genuine pride at the news, confirming once again just by the timber of his voice that someone's better than him.

"Thank you, Adam."

Connor decides to ignore their eyes love making with each other in favor of spilling himself a glass of wine, then his hand freezes midair when Adam's voice, back to being firm and cold says, "I think that's enough wine for you, Connor."

"I just had two glasses of wine." Connor retorts doing nothing to hide the irritated pitch of his voice, then Adam's hands reach to grab the bottle of wine from the table and glass out of his trembling hands.

"Stop embarrassing yourself in front of our guests." and then he keeps talking to his guests, like nothing ever happened, praising Connor's hard work on the football field.

 

Connor's standing on the balcony of his room, his eyes staring absent-mindedly into the air as his mind wonders where is Jude, what is he doing if he's imagining about an alternate universe in which they're allowed to be together, when the very annoying voice snaps him back from his thoughts.

"Who is he?"

Connor hides the cigarette behind his back but suddenly the boy's hand comes to steal it away from his hands, bringing it to his lips without any permission from Connor and taking a inhale of smoke before smirking, "Come on, we'll be husbands in a couple of years. You can trust me.”

"Husbands," Connor repeats with the same disgust of someone who has been sucked a lime in his mouth. "There's no one."

It's a shameful lie but it still manages to burn a hole through his chest at the truth behind those words, because as long as Connor lies to himself, there's just no way to escape his father's will. His alpha. His nightmare who's arranged him to marry a complete prick for his own benefits.

"You look like you're going to choke yourself to death whenever our family talks about our future." Preston points out, grinning with pride at the exhaustion flashing across Connor's features.

"What _future_? You mean _me_ being forced to marry someone I'll never love because of business? Well, I'm sorry to break it to you but that's not what I'd call future."

The boy doesn't seem affected by the enraged edge behind Connor's words, indeed, it only manages to increase the vivid satisfaction on his face as he shrugs, "If you ask me, it's something that _will_ happen, whether you like it or not. So yeah, I'd call it future."

"Don't play smart with me." Connor fires back, harshly taking the cigarette from Preston's hands.

"I'm not. I'd never, oh mighty Alpha." Preston muses, his eyes glimmering with amusement. "You know what's funny?"

Connor exhales a loud breath, wondering how injured would he get if he threw himself from the balcony, right now.

"You're the alpha but I hold over you so, can we not with the whole scowling and growling thing and act like civilized beings? I mean it was hot at first but it's getting annoying at some point." Preston trails off with a small laugh before walking past him, towards the end of the balcony. He's looking at the sky with his back turned towards Connor, his voice firm and determined as he says, "You got few years to get used to the idea of what the future holds for us."

"Years of misery and death wishes." Connor concludes. There's nothing but plain resignation filling his voice.

 

 

He goes to school the following morning and as any other day, his eyes start wandering over the crowd of people in the hallway, looking for Jude. He's not supposed to, like any other day, but this time it's an unstoppable wave of anxiety growing over his chest that makes him hard to focus throughout classes.

"Hey, have you seen Jude?"

Taylor slowly turns around as being startled by Connor's voice addressing to her, in the flesh. She looks up with wide eyes, her cheeks turning pink as she stutters out.

"Huh.. hi! h-he s-stayed home."

Connor's concern only increases in his voice and written all over his features. "Is he okay? Is he sick?"

"Huh, n-no but he said something like burning and-- wait! Where are you running to?"

Her voice sounds distant and blends with other people's voices chatting in the school's hallway. He climbs into his car and any resolution he's made about leaving Jude living his own life just fly out of the window the moment he turns the engine on.

Only when he's parked in Jude's driveway he spends half a second wondering what Jude reaction will be, since they already shared their l _ast goodbye._ Several times, actually but then the moment he climbs out of the car and hops towards the door, he freezes in his steps. His nostrils flare breathing in the sweetest scent he's ever being blessed to encounter in his entire life causing blood to rush straight to his cock, hardening in his jeans because this smell and Jude's parents apparently being gone from the house and his absence from school could only mean one thing.

Connor inhales sharply before taking courage to knock on the door, well aware that once he's stepped inside there's no turning back from this. So he just stands there, breathing in so sharply that his nostrils burn a bit in a freak attempt to keep that smell memorized. The door finally opens, revealing Jude bare chest, wearing nothing but a light pair of shorts. His eyes go wide in no second, the hold he has on the doorknob just gets tighter, his fingers clenching around it.

"Connor, what a-are you doing here?"

"I'm here to help." Connor says without further introduction.

Jude's shoulders go tense, his eyes lowering to the ground as he shakes his head slightly, "Y-you can't.. y-you can't show up here. Y-you can't just say things like that!"

"You're in heat." Connor says calmly, pointing out the obvious. "I can help.. p-please, let me help you."

Jude gives a small noise from his throat the moment he hears Connor's voice filled with almost desperation as he reaches for his hand. The moment their hands touch and Jude's eyes slowly flicker up, glimmering with fear and vulnerability and meet Connor's, who are nothing but him firm and determined, it's like the Pandora vase has just being opened.

 

 

"I need you. Please Connor, enough with foreplay."

Connor smirks, lifting his head from where it's buried in Jude's neck and takes a look at his masterpiece. His dick twitches with interest at the presence of red marks all over Jude's neck as the work of an artist on canvas.

 

Connor didn't lose any time in pushing Jude's body against the door, the moment the corners of Jude's lips have quirked up in a smile and said.

"Come inside."

They barely made it to Jude's bedroom whose door has been slammed shut with more force than necessary. Connor has pushed him on his back on the unmade bed and pulled his pants down, revealing Jude's pretty cock hard and leaking and in need of care. Connor has stripped off his clothes while never dislodging his lustful eyes from Jude's who looked back at him with hunger and want and desperation in his eyes. Then Connor has lowered his mouth on Jude's body and took his cock into his mouth, moaning at the sensation of precum dripping from the tip and filling his mouth in the most amazing way. Jude's hips started arch off the bed in pleasure as a hand took a handful of Connor's hair with every swipe of his tongue over his cock head.

"You feel so good." Jude has panted breathlessly. His eyes shut in the immense pleasure flooding through his body. "...Your mouth, God."

Connor pulled away with a wet pop of his mouth, wrapping his fingers around the length and stroking in time with his finger teasingly circling around his rim. "Please Connor. Put your fingers in me. W-want everything in me."

Those words said with such reverence and trust and fondness sent a rush of pride flooding through his chest and, at the same time, saddening him because this is just an occurrence. It's not his place to take care of Jude in the future heats. He's not going to be here and take care of him as _his omega._

"I love you."

It doesn't make his feelings invalid or untrue. "I love you so much."

Jude's eyes has fluttered open, staring at him quizzically, probably wondering if he's missed something or it's just a total random declaration of love. He reached for Connor's cheek and started stroking it with his thumb, gently, soothingly and _knowingly._

"I love you, too." Jude has breathed out, his eyes moistening with sadness. "But--"

Connor doesn't need to hear it. He knows. It's written in the stars their future and apparently, it's not with each other.

"I know."

He has lowered himself down on Jude's body and rested his head into the crook of Jude's neck, just breathe in the scent of this beautiful boy that's gonna be someone else's, someday.

"I just want this." Jude cried out in his ear, the moment Connor's lips start sucking bites on the pale expanse of his neck.

"Just one last time."

Connor closed his eyes and cleared his mind off everything not relevant right now but him and Jude. He'd lie if he said that he hasn't covered Jude in marks as to mark his territory somehow-- a territory he doesn't own, His mind kindly reminds him. But from the noises Jude made, he didn't seem to mind so he just kept going on it, sucking and biting and _marking_ everything that someday will be someone else but that right now, that _today_ , is only his.

 

"Make me yours." Jude cries out loudly, his lips falling open against Connor's. The pleasure so unbelievably intense that makes them difficult to keep kissing. Not when Jude's rocking against three fingers in him, stretching him open for the moment his cock will finally fill him up. Connor has to grip the head of his dick with one hand because he's sure that Jude's desperate mewls of pleasure could make him spill too early and that's not going to happen under any circumstances.

It's not the first time they're having sex but it's the first time they're having sex _during the heat_ and everything, sounds, scent, pleasure, lust is intensified beyond belief. The only thing Connor cares about now is to make Jude cry his name, begging for more, get drunk on pleasure. Right now, the only thing that matters is them, doing this. There's no Adam and Preston, no pressure, no responsibilities. It's just them.

Jude and Connor.

The proof that sometimes true love is just not enough.

  
*****

"I got my acceptance letter." Jude announces quietly, breaking the silence between them. Connor clears his throat, suddenly gone dry. He brushes his fingers through Jude's hair and asks, already dreading the answer, "Where to?"

Jude remains in silence, a heavy silence that Connor's unable to comprehend and raises a doubt in his mind. "Aren't you going to tell me?"

"What's the point?" Jude finally exhales, his voice on the verge of breaking on a sob. "It's not like we're going to see each other again.."

It hurts to hear those words, despite being the plain truth.

"Is that why you're refusing to tell me? So to prevent any ambush from my side?"

"Well, You ambushed me today." Jude points out.

"I didn't hear you complaining.." Connor retorts immediately. Jude gives a small sigh before lifting his head from Connor's chest, meeting his eyes. "You know what I mean.. W-we lose control over ourselves whenever we're close."

"Do I make you lose control?" Connor asks him with teasing voice, his finger brushing a strand of hair falling over his brow. Jude's cheeks get flushed and Connor's more than sure that one of his comebacks is going to hit him but surprisingly Jude gives a nod of his head.

"You did nothing but make me lose control." Jude sighs heavily before reaching to stroke one of Connor's cheek, "That's why this is our last goodbye."

Connor gives a loud intake of breath, fighting back tears but it's a losing battle. He knows that. Especially when Jude starts crying in his arms, it's hard to keep his emotions in check.

"Whatever happens.. I'll never forget you." Jude murmurs against his beating heart.

"Me neither."

 

Preston insists on being his prom date to which Connor fires back with a big fat _No._  
His father shakes his head in disappointment with a wince of repulsion written all over his face, the moment he watched Preston walking out of the door.

"Did you have to turn him down like the idea of going to prom with him repulse you to the core?"

"The idea of going to prom with him repulse me to the core." Connor points out harshly earning to himself one of the best Adam Stevens's disdained look.

"Your mother would be highly disappointed in you, son."

That's the thing with Adam. He got no shame in using Connor's mom as an exploit for his own benefits.

"When will you and those fanatic--"

"Watch it." Adam chastises him with a warning tone in his voice, "That's gonna be your family, too."

Connor can't control the humorless laugh escaping his lips, raising his eyes to the ceiling as he spits out, "That's never going to be my family! You're basically selling your son for a partnership with Preston's family business! That's not how a family works! A family is love, happiness, is.. _home_."

Adam growls in annoyance, as he snaps, "Christ, Connor. You are so weak. You do really think those values will give you a place in the world? You think the world out there is all rainbows and unicorns, huh? Let me break it to you. It's not. The world out there is cold and cruel, It doesn't think twice before spitting in your face so I'm not gonna apologize for simply trying to look after you and Give you a steady, _safe_ future with the son of the richest and most influential man in the entire California, so drop it with the whole whining and grow some balls, son."

Connor feels the effect of those words washing over him, a tug in his chest that makes him stay silence when the only thing Connor would want to do is run out of that fucking door. Away from this house, from this Alpha, away from a marriage agreement he doesn't want to be a part of.

 

 

Connor wins, as everyone predicted, as prom's king. He gets on stage and smiles charmingly to his adoring public standing beneath the stage, clapping and whistling when Daria places the crown on his head. Connor's eyes spot Jude's in the crowd with such an ease.. just like he's being standing under a spotlight. Jude's clapping too, his smile soft and relaxed but when being met by his gaze, noticed by Connor, his smile quickly fades away. He watches him regain his composure, his shoulders going rigid before leaning towards Taylor's ear, whispering something in her ear. From the way Taylor's smile disappears from her face, turning into a confused frown that must not be sounding like something good. Jude throws one last look at him before making his way through he crowd, towards the main entry. Connor's mouth falls open as he watches Jude walking out of the room, never looking back.

 

 

Connor knows it's what they were supposed to do in a very long time but they've always known that every 'last time' wasn't really the last time so when it happens, it feels like Jude took a piece of his heart and his soul and never gave it back.

He knows it's a terrible decision but he needs to see Jude once more before leaving to Berkeley, giving him his last, permanent goodbye. He's not going to come home often, he's decided. His father will most likely come to check on him at school and honestly coming back home will cause him another heartbreak to add to the pile.

It's Stef opening the door, a look of shock mixed with concern written all over her face.

"Connor.. huh, Hi."

"Hi." Connor exhales, sounding a bit breathless as he asks, "Is Jude here?"

"Huh, he already left."

"To school?" Connor asks her, quirking an eyebrow at the look of discomfort she sends in his way.

"Yes."

It really doesn't sound like the truth at all.

"Are you telling me the truth?"  
"Why would I lie to you?"

"To protect your son." Connor promptly replies.

"Then you should know better than ask that question, Connor."

"You know I can track his scent, right?"

She doesn't look too uncomfortable for someone who has just being called off for lying to his face.

"Go live your life, Connor."

"I want to say goodbye."

"You already did." Stef sighs, " _You never meant it_." She adds with stern look sent in his way.

Which is the truth. Connor can't deny it.

"Please.."

"I can't let you see him."

It confuses Connor beyond belief because she's saying that she _can't_ , not that she doesn't want to.

"Why?"

"He asked me to."

"B-but--"

Connor doesn't understand, well, he understands that he's been a hypocrite in the past but he really needs to see Jude one last time before actually leaving him to live his life without him in it.

Is that so hard to understand? But again, he forced Jude so many times in the last six months to say goodbye to him that the thought of putting him into that situation once again breaks his heart more than he already has.

"Okay." He sighs, dropping his sweaty hands, previously being clasped together, to his sides. "I know better than forcing him to see me.."

"He doesn't want to hurt you and you should do the same."

“Can you tell him one more thing? Before I leave for good?”

Stef looks hesitant, probably knowing that it will emotionally destroy her son even further.

“Okay..”

“Tell him I love him and if he ever wants to talk to me, h-he has my number.”

“Okay, I can do that..” Connor lowers his gaze, breathing harshly and fighting back tears because that's it. It's done. For good.

 

Stef stands on the threshold of their house watching Connor leave with his car, when Jude joins her on the porch.

“Is he gone?”

Stef turns around and wraps her arms around her son's shaking shoulders, “Yes.”

“I had to..” Jude cries against her shoulder,  “I had to let him go. I'm sorry, mom.”

“Shhh, honey.. it's okay.. it's okay. Momma and I will take care of you two.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on twitter: En_sky9 or tumblr: skyblue993
> 
> Feedback is always appreciated


	2. Chapter 2

The last thing Jude expected when he turned eighteen was to stress over job hunting instead of leaving for college. There's no way he could fit a pregnancy into his study plan so instead of stressing over exams, classes, apartment hunting Jude found himself stressing over food cravings, pregnancy hormones, baby supplies and furniture shopping.

 

 

He bursts through the door of the kitchen, his breath short in his throat as he cries out in total panic, "He's here!"

Taylor, standing before the stove raises an eyebrow in confusion, "Who's here?"

"H-he.. h-he just came through the door with his fiancè! Oh God, T-Tay! What the fuck do I do? W-what if he.. what if he smells something on me?"

"Jude. _Calm the fuck down_. Who are we worrying about, now?"

"Connor."

Taylor didn't seem unperturbed, almost as he was expecting that. "Oh."

"Oh?" Jude repeats with an eyebrow arched up, his heart skipping beats in his chest.

"That's all you're going to say?"

"I saw him."

"Where? And why didn't you tell me?"

"He came here.. with that guy, yesterday."  
Jude waits expectantly for an answer that hopefully won't include the words: " _Wedding venue."_

"They booked the Starfish gala room for--"

"Here." Jude's processing the words, repeating them slowly on a trembling breath. "They're going to-- _here."_

"Yes, Jude."

Jude nods before taking off his jacket and slamming it on the counter, "I quit."

Taylor rolls her eyes before marching toward him. She grabs the jacket and pushes it to his chest. “The hell you will quit this job.”

"If he ever finds you.. if he-- he'll take him away from me, Taylor."

"That's exactly the reason why you should've told him, ages ago! He deserved to know.."

"For Christ sake, Taylor. I told you that his father had this marriage planned since Connor was still in pre-school!"

"I don't think--"

"Well okay, maybe no that early but, come on! He would have never allowed Connor to be around his son."

"Tommy is his grandchild--"  
Jude tries to maintain his temper at the name of his baby in relation to that monster, because only people without a glimpse of love in their bones, would do what he did to Jude. The words almost split out of his mouth but then, recalling that no one, not even Taylor knows about the day Adam Stevens showed up to his house, gives him the strength to bite on his bottom lip, once again bottling that resentment and hate to himself.

"Taylor, just stop. Okay? Adam..” Jude trails off with a sigh, trying to find the most accurate word to describe Connor's father. “Adam is _heartless._ "

 

 

"Can someone come out here? Thank you!"

"That's my cue.." Jude sighs on his way to the door, hearing Taylor's voice wishing him good luck.

He feels his heart rising to his throat with every step he makes towards the couple sitting at one of their best table of the restaurant, the one with the best panoramic look of the entire city.

Connor is still reading the menu, momentarily unaware of his presence so close, so Jude takes a moment to himself for just stealing a brief look at the boy, just to check what changed and what stayed the same. He doesn't seem changed, which is only fair since it really hasn't been that long, three years maybe since the last time he saw him. His eyes are examining the menu as his nose scrunches up adorably while reading the main courses.

Jude awkwardly approaches the couple at the table and pulls out the PDA out of his pocket, murmuring a polite. "Good evening, I'm Jude and I'll be your waiter for tonight."

At his name, Connor's head jerks up so fast that causes his neck to creak. Jude's eyes are firm on the screen of the PDA in his trembling hands, refusing to look at the boy sitting at the table that honestly looks like he could use a glass of water, right now.

"Can I take your orders?"

The other man, sitting across from Connor, reaches for his hand and asks with quiet, cooing voice, "Have you decided yet, honey boo?"

Jude felt bile rising in his throat at the sickeningly sweet pet name, feeling like throwing up a little bit into his mouth.

Jude finally looks at the man's face, currently flushed red with embarrassment as he stutters out, "Huh, no.. I.. I'm still deciding."

"Okay." Jude decides to seize the moment and crawl back to his safe place, _the kitchen_.  
"Let me know when you've decided and I'll come back to take your o--"

"Oh shit." The man curses, suddenly standing up from the table before walking towards the balcony that overlooks the whole city, before picking up to the phone call "Hello? Hey, Dad."

Jude's about to walk away because there's no way in hell he's going to spend one-half of a second alone with Connor Stevens when he's being abruptly holding back by Connor's hand on his wrist.

"Jude."

Jude slowly turns around, looking at him with a pained look on his face.

"Hey.."

Connor clearly ignores the constipated look Jude sends in his way in favor to chit chat like two old acquaintances which honestly makes blood to boil in Jude's veins. If there's anything they haven't been to each other is exactly that, since they went straight from best friends to boyfriends to strangers.

"How are you? You work here?"

"Yeah.. I do."Jude admits with trembling voice, "I'm fine. I'm.. I'm fine." He repeats mostly to convince himself than Connor and then he asks, just because he's well educated certainly not because he's eager to hear any details of his incoming wedding. "How have you been?"

"Good." Connor tells him with a small smile playing on the corners of his lips. "I've been good."

"Good." Jude's eyes flicker to Connor's hand still wrapped around his wrist. He clears his throat."You should probably let me go before he comes back."

Something flashes across Connor's eyes, it's just a fragment of a second then it's gone, replaced by his charming smile of default. "I guess you're right."

 

Jude steps into the kitchen, leaning with his back against the door. Taylor, like most of her crew, notices how Jude is completely flushed in the face.

"How was it?"

Jude just closes his eyes, breathing sharply through his nose.

"I'd rather die than take their orders.."

"I'll send someone else." She says, addressing to Juan. "Hey J. Could you take over Jude's table?"

"Claro que si."

She winks at him then she turns towards Jude, "See? Being the daughter's boss has its benefits."

"Thank you. I owe you one."

  
Connor's gaze follows every of his movement as he serves another table, not too far from theirs. Jude tries to ignore it as much as he can but eventually, as the couple at his table are still arguing over the wine choice, he succumbs to temptation and let his eyes to wander over his table. Their eyes met from across the room and it's suddenly hot all over Jude's body because Connor's gaze is intense, burning, intent like he can't bring himself to look away from him.

Jude shifts uncomfortably on his spot, feeling droplets of sweat suddenly making their way down his forehead as his hand, holding the pen, starts trembling just slightly. It's not Connor's gaze per se that makes Jude squirm this much; Is the similarity with Tommy that takes his breath away. It shouldn't really surprise Jude because the apple doesn't fall that far from the tree after all but it does, every time Tommy starts fussing and pouting with that stubborn attitude of his, holding his challenging gaze onto Jude's with hazel eyes big and bright that remind him of Connor every single day of his life, reminds him that he's deliberately deprived his son of a father.

Juan approaches him with a smile, in the back of the kitchen handing him over a fifty dollar bill.

"What is this?"

"The hot guy with the prick mate asked me to give it to you." Jude frowns while staring at the bill, then he gives it back to Juan.

"You should keep this.”

Juan shrugs his shoulders, saying. "Hot dude insisted. He said it's important."

Taylor wipes her hands against the apron as she curiously peeks over Jude's shoulder. "What the fuck is that?"

"A tip." Jude gulps down saliva before turning it into his hands, his mouth falls open in a soft gasp when he recognizes Connor's handwriting on the back of the bill. There's a phone number written on the back and then, _"Call me."_

Jude huffs a laugh, leaning against the counter for physical support, unsure if after the last few hours he'll be able to stand on his feet. "I can't believe this shit.."

Taylor looks at him with eyes blown wide while Juan looks just more confused than ever. "What is going on?"

Jude's eyes flicker over the note for a long moment, then he announces through a shaky breath.  
"I'm taking my break."

  
Jude leans against the rail of the balcony, staring at the number dialed on his phone contemplating for a moment if he's about to make a terrible mistake. He's probably is whenever Connor is concerned, as he said once; Whenever they're close they lose control over themselves. The proof that Connor's presence still makes him feel this vulnerable is a visual proof of that statement.

He decided to push the call button because curiosity wins the better of him. He waits and waits and waits until Connor finally picks up the phone. "Jude?"

"How did you know it was me?" It comes out more as a laugh than a question. There's a long silence coming from the other end of the line, then Connor finally breathes out, admitting through a quiet breath. "I don't usually get lots of calls on this number."

"Oh." Jude just says, shaking his head because of course, Connor wouldn't give him his private number. "Right."

"That's not what I meant." Connor says in a hurry, "I mostly get calls on my office number..."

"That makes sense." Jude tells him, his gaze lost in the multitude of cars flashing beneath his feet on the highway. "Why did you want me to call?"

Another long silence.

"I wanted to check on you."

"I'm fine." Jude lies. Cause he's not. He's never been genuinely _fine_ since Connor left but Connor doesn't need to hear any of that, he probably doesn't want to either. He's just trying to be polite. That's all.

"So _fine_ that you switched tables with someone else?"

Jude swears he can hear Connor's smirk from over the phone despite the awful silence fallen by his end.

"Were you really surprised?"

"Not really." Connor promptly replies, "I don't blame you."

"Okay." Jude says, firm and harsh. "Then don't judge me for doing that."

"I wasn't judging you." Connor fights back, "I was just--"

Jude cuts him off before he even has the chance to explain why the fuck would he care if someone else took care of his orders or why he's been staring at him throughout the whole night.

"Just what? Trying to make a point? Seriously, Connor. Did you expect me to give you my congratulations for your imminent wedding and for God Sake... of all the fucking venues in San Diego--"

"I didn't know you worked there." Connor cuts him off, "Do you seriously think I would do that on purpose?"

"No, I don't think you'd do such an evil move. That's why I'm expecting you to choose another venue."

"What-- Jude, are you being serious, right now?"

"Of course I am!"

"I can't-- fuck. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to find a venue, these days? Besides, that's the best venue I've come across so far!"

"That means your search isn't over." Jude fires back, "Gives you the opportunity to expand your venues research."

"Why are you being like this?"

Connor doesn't sound mad. He just sounds weary, exhausted.

"Excuse me but I don't want to serve you shrimp alfredo on your wedding day."

"I won't change my venue just because you say so, Jude."  
  
"Okay. Then I'll quit the job."

"Jude--"

"Have a nice wedding, Connor."

Jude knows it's childish to hang up the phone like this but he can't bring himself to hear whatever Connor feels the need to add. He realizes he's made a terrible mistake when the breeze blowing in his face dries the tears spilling from his eyes and streaming down his cheeks.

 

Mariana calls him, the following morning and asks Jude if she can perhaps drop Tommy off to the restaurant after picking him up from pre-school because she has a job interview around 2 pm and can't babysit him until Jude gets back home.

Jude asks his boss, aka Taylor's father and the only person outside his family and Taylor that knows the whole truth about what he's gone through for the past few years. Taylor's father tells him there's no problem at all. He's even offered to entertain Tommy until the end of his shift and that makes Jude's heart fill with warmth because he's given up on a college education in favor of searching for a job but he doesn't regret starting to work for this man, who has always treated him like family.

Of course, Jude's genuine contentedness has short life because, around midday, Connor shows up at the restaurant. Jude has just come out of the kitchen and almost makes all the plates shatter on the floor at the sight of the young man standing in the lobby.

On his way back the kitchen, Jude stops by and asks him through gritted teeth, visibly irritated by his presence.

"What the hell are you doing here?!"

Connor looks visibly startled by Jude's harsh tone in his voice when he looks up, meeting the brunette's severe gaze.

"I came here to cancel the reservation I made for the Starfish ballroom."

Jude's lips part slightly, releasing a surprised noise from his throat before being startled by a shrieking, well knowing, voice coming in his way.

"Daddy!" Jude turns towards the main entry where a little _smurf_ is running through with his arms wide open. Jude decides to ignore the shocked look Connor sends in his way and the short intake of breath leaving his lips in favor of slipping into the parent's shoes.

"How many times do I have to tell you must not run here?"

Mariana's trailing after Tommy on her heels, panting. "I kept scolding him but he just wouldn't listen to me!"

"Well, it's hard to run after a three-year-old in those heels." Jude points out before bending down to pick his son into his arms. Tommy's arms immediately lace around his neck, holding on tight.

"I missed you, daddy!"

Jude just holds him tighter, hiding his face in his hair, his nostrils flaring as the soft vanilla scent fills his senses. "I missed you too."

 

Mariana trails forward on buckling legs, momentarily unaware of Connor's figure standing right there, pale in the face like he's just seen a ghost. She hands it over Tommy's backpack to Jude and bends down to press a kiss in her nephew's wild hair.

"I'll see you tomorrow, kid."

"Say bye to aunt Mariana." Jude tells him with cooing voice. Tommy buries his face into the crook of Jude's neck, murmuring a muffling, "Bye aunt Mali."

Jude laughs at the face Mariana does whenever Tommy spells her name wrong.

"Bye Kiddo." She says, then she kisses Jude on the cheek. "Bye Jude."

"Bye Mari."

She turns around with a smile on her lips and walks back towards the entry, murmuring as he walks past Connor.

"Bye Conn--" Then she freezes. "Wait. What?!"

She turns to look at him with a look on her face that screams 'What the fuck are you doing here?”

"Mariana? Your job interview? Please?"

Mariana turns to look at her little brother, whose face is still buried in his son's hair but his eyes are peeking from the luscious wild hair and pleading to let this whole thing go, for now.

Mariana frowns but she knows Jude can't talk about this, right now, besides, she has an interview to attend to. "I'll see you at home, Jude.."

 

  
Jude finally deems Connor worthy of his attention, they eyes lock from over Tommy's blond hair. Connor's eyes are big and startled as he stares at him, his mouth is slowly falling open letting a breathy gasp to come out. Jude knows that look, especially when Connor blinks few times as to make sure that what he's seeing right now isn't just an image conjured by his mind. Tommy starts fussing into Jude's arms indicating that he'd rather walk on his own, so Jude gently puts him down. Tommy's hand starts tugging at the strap of his backpack and Jude lets it down as well, never ever dislodging his gaze from Connor.

Tommy opens his backpack and pulls out a piece of paper, then he looks up with that happy look on his face, that never ceases to fill his heart with light, and tugs on the sleeve of his shirt.

"Daddy look! I made this in _pre-cool_!"

Jude lifts the paper Tommy's so eager to show him and he can't possibly help the smile creeping over his lips. It's two circles each one with two points and a curvy line in it. The one that's supposed to be Jude has three erect strands of hair on his head and stylized arms and legs while the other one has fuzzy, messy hair. It's not a piece of art. Most definitely. But it manages to melt Jude's heart like never before in his life.

"That's beautiful.."

"Daddy and Tomo."

"Daddy and Tomo," Jude repeats softly, then the magic moments just fades away when he hears Connor letting out a guttural sound from his throat and Jude realizes that they have to be alone for this kind of conversation.

He bends down and leaves a kiss on his forehead, murmuring. "You know where to find Jojo, right?"

Tommy nods his head and starts bouncing on the ball off his feet, "Go find him. I've heard he has a beautiful coloring book but don't tell him I told you, okay?"

"Yes, dad!" Tommy shrieks before racing into the restaurant hall with the pace of a runaway horse.

"Do not run!"

Tommy slows down, then when Jude turns around Connor says.

"He's running again."

Jude sighs, letting out a strangled laugh.

"Of course he is."

Connor's lips are stretched in a thin line, his eyes weary and mostly confused. "I didn't know you had a kid."

"You don't know a lot of things about me." Jude points out harsher than necessary. "I mean, you barely know me now."

"Fair point, I guess." Connor concedes with a weird pitch in his voice, low and almost... sad? "The boy I loved would have never kept something from me."

Jude's heart sinks at those words, confusion and anger and hatred all rushing up his throat through a vomit of words because okay, he's lied but.. this is not fair. He's always taken what Connor had to give him, regardless of anything else. He selfishly took to himself what he knew was meant for someone else since Connor revealed to him about his dad's plans for his future. Yes. He's done a terrible mistake when he's decided not to tell him about his pregnancy but what else was left for him to do? Connor had a great future ahead of him. He was going to attend Berkeley just like his mother did, then a job position as CEO in his father's company just waiting for him once college was over and a husband chosen by his father so that his company could become even bigger, even greater. His future was already written and Jude.. Jude and his baby didn't fit in that future.

They were a threat to Connor's future. That's how Adam referred to them, once.

"What the hell does that mean?"

"You know exactly what that means!"

"Just answer the fucking question, Connor. You said the boy I loved would have never kept something from me. I kept nothing from you."

In the end, that isn't a complete and total lie. They were already acting like strangers when Jude found out about the pregnancy.

Connor stares at him completely taken aback by Jude's, apparently firm, statement.

"Are you serious, right now? Y-you kept something huge from me! Just say it. You kept him away from me all those years.. j-just say he's mine!"

"He's _mine_! And okay, I haven't told you because honestly, what would have changed? Nothing. Fucking, nothing! You were still going to Berkeley. You were still going to marry that prick! So what's the point of ruining your life if we've never meant to be together?"

"Ruin my life? What the fuck, Jude? How can you think that a baby would have ruined my life?"

"Because it wasn't Preston's! That's why! Your father--"

"What the fuck my father has to do in all of this? It's about me and you!" Connor cuts his words off, his eyebrows furrowing in perplexion. Jude bites his bottom lip in order but this time nothing seems to quench the anger firing through him. 

He's never expected anything from Connor. He's never expected Connor to run off the sunset with him. He's never expected Connor to take his responsibilities over the baby.   
Jude has loved him enough to choose to let him go, let him leave the life his father planned for him and despite that, his father had to remind him what a horrible mistake he's been to his son by showing up to his house..

No.

This time Jude is not intentioned to stay put, not after all the shit that Adam Stevens has thrown in his face.

Not this time.

"Ask your father, Connor."

"What, Jude? What my father has to do with this?"

Jude closes his eyes, wetting his bottom lip as he exhales, "According to your beloved father, Tommy and I were an obstacle to your bright future that he needed to get out of the way.." 

"Tell me." Connor insists with firm voice, admitting no objections.

"What's the point?"

"Stop-- fuck! Stop saying shit like that! Tell me what my father did to you."

"Fine." Jude sighs, his eyes staring into Connor's as he reveals, "Your father somehow found out I was pregnant and showed up to my house, once."

Connor looks sincerely shocked by Jude's revelation if the way his mouth falls agape is anything to go by.. Jude takes it as an indication to go on.

"He tried to bribe me with a ten thousand dollars check to get an abortion."

 

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

"He didn't-- he.. h-he didn't."

Connor's gaze is blank and empty fixed on some random point on the carpet as he keeps murmuring those words to himself, erratically shaking his head as to clear those accusations off his mind.

“I'm sorry, Connor..”

Jude decides to walk towards him on hesitant steps coming to a stop in front ot Connor cupping his face in his warm hands and Connor finally snaps out of the moment of loop. The moment he lifts his eyes to Jude's face, searching for his eyes, he whimpers one more time as to desperately check for confirmation that he's misheard, that his father wouldn't do something like this to him. To them.

"He didn't."

Jude's eyes fell close, unable to witness the look of heartbreak written all over Connor's face as he murmurs for the second time that day, "He wanted me to get rid of my-” He trails off on a sigh before correcting himself, “-- _our,_ son."

Connor's eyes being to glimmer with tears as he breathes out, holding onto Jude for dear life. Jude can't bring himself to care about how inappropriate this is. He just holds Connor just as tight. "I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault--"

"It's my father and I.. I gave up on everything for him..."

"It's your father." Jude says softly, as it's a valid justification for all the pain he's caused. It's not, but it's not Jude's place to remark what a unhealthy parental figure is to Connor. "Besides, you hadn't to give up on much more than  _me_." 

"Don't you get it? Jude you.. you were my everything."

Those words, in addition to the traces of tears glimmering into Connor's eyes, makes Jude feel a physical pain settling in his stomach. Then Connor's whole body start trembling, his voice breaking on a sob.

"I'm going to kill him-- I.. I don't even know what I'm going to do." Then before Jude has the opportunity to hold him there, Connor's walking towards the entry with steady, raging steps. He gives a moan before running after him, winding the air out of his lungs as he yells, “Connor! This is not the right solution!”

But Connor's already standing in the elevator when Jude finally catches up with him, the doors sliding shut between them as Jude begs him. “Do not slaughter your father!”

Connor looks at him blankly, the edge of his lips curving in a hollow smile.

 

 

Jude has just tucked Tommy into bed when he's suddenly startled by the sound of the bell ringing. He makes his way downstairs with an awful foreboding spinning through his mind, having figured that if someone's ringing at his door at 10 pm, it's certainly not going to be a social call.

He nearly has a heart attack the moment he opens the door and he's met by the sight of a painful-looking black eye.  
He gasps loudly, covering his mouth with his hands wondering why the hell Connor looks like he's just been run over by a truck.

"Connor, what the fuck happened to your face?"

Connor just stares at him. His gaze weary and empty. Then he breathes out a feeble question, "Can I come in?"

Jude nods, swallowing down the question that wants to emerge.

"This way.."

"I know your house, Jude." Connor says, managing to pull out his sarcasm despite the gravity of the situation.

Jude suggests him to sit down on his couch while he makes some hot tea. Connor murmurs a low 'Thanks' before sitting down on the comfortable couch that despite the years, still looks the same causing some painful yet beautiful memories to flood through his mind.

"Where is everyone?"

"Moms are visiting my grandma's house. They're coming back in two days, while everyone has its own place."

"Oh.. I thought Mariana said--"

"She just stopped by." Jude cuts his words off, "S-she wanted to talk.. you know.."

"About us." Connor concludes for him.

"Yeah." Jude sighs, then as he walks out of the room, Connor hears him murmuring under his breath, "As if I'm not sure there has ever been an _us_."

  
Jude comes back in the room with a cup of hot tea in his hand, murmuring a quiet, "Here, drink this."

"Thank you, Jude." Connor says, lowering down his gaze to the steam radiating from the hot beverage. "I'm sorry if I crushed here without calling first."

Jude sighs as he sits down on the couch next to him. He decides to leave some safe distance between their bodies but he's close enough to get a full view of that bruised eye. He _so_ doesn't need to ask what happened because a part of him knows and it's the same part that doesn't want to hear the answer but then the words rise up his throat without even thinking.

"You assaulted him." It's not a question because Jude knows what the answer would be and the silence that Connor reserves to him as a response clears his mind from any doubts left. "I begged you--"

Connor interrupts him quickly, looking up from the cup and staring into his eyes as he says, "I went to talk to him, like a civilized human being--"

Jude rolls his eyes because going by the way Connor has stormed off, that same night, he looked like he couldn't even handle to be giving someone driving directions without jumping their bones.

"But you ended up acting like a wild animal." Jude cuts him off with a harsh tone, a plenty judgment tone in his voice as he remarks, "You stooped to his level.”

"He tried to kill our son." Connor retorts immediately, almost sounding incredulous by Jude's statement.

"My son." Jude corrects him absent-mindedly, regretting those words slipping from his tongue the immediate moment they leave his mouth.

Connor looks at him for a long moment, blankly, then he just spits out a hollow laugh, remarking with a bitter edge in his voice, “Yeah, and who's fault is that? Tell me, Jude who's fault is that I never met Tommy? The son you never told me I had. The one that was supposed to be raised by two fathers!”

"Connor, I know you're feeling a lot of things right now--" Jude regrets making such a remark in the throes of such a delicate situation, also because Connor's right. He's made a mistake, a terrible mistake. A mistake made by an insecure, heartbroken eighteen years old who said goodbye to the man he loved -- _several times_ \-- and found himself in a situation way bigger than him.

"You don't know _shit_ about me! That's the problem! Everyone keeps manipulating me like I'm some kind of fucking puppet and I'm fucking sick of it."

"I never manipulated you. I--"

"Maybe so but you took a decision that wasn't yours to take! I should have been here. I should have been able to prevent all of this from happening."

 _Whoah, okay._ Jude thinks bitterly, processing those fired up words hitting him in his face without any shame. _But why didn't you then? Why didn't you stay when you had the chance? You told me you loved me. You told me I was the man of your life and I was too stupidly in love with you to believe any single word you say, thinking you had no chance but stand to your father will, but only then I realized that you did have a choice. You could have chosen me.”_

 

"Well, yeah. Maybe you should have. But you know what? Maybe if you grew some balls and stood up to your father, maybe our son was never going to be stuck with one dad.”

Silence.

Dead silence from both sides.

Jude kinda feels like a shit for spitting those words but hell if it is nothing but the truth.

Connor rubs his eyeballs as he gives an exhausted sigh. Jude knows the sensation, going through this discussion back and forth is draining out of energies.

"This is unfair, Jude and you know it. I had no choice. I _literally_ didn't know.”

"You were engaged--” Jude groans, raising his eyes to the ceiling being promptly called off by Connor's sharp voice, debating, once again. "I wasn't engaged!"

"You could have chosen me, then!" Jude cries, exasperation burning in his voice. "I was waiting.. I've always waited for you to tell me _I choose you, one day_  but you didn't! You never did! And I had to endure the sight of you every single day at school and remind myself that you weren't mine!"

"I was just a kid--"

"You stayed the same." Jude spits out, letting out a humorless laugh. "That's what brought you here today, stressing over a wedding venue where to celebrate a marriage you don't want to be a part of, and a black eye."

  
Connor stares down to his cup, thinking that Jude's not wrong but Jude doesn't know what it's like to be Adam Steven's son.

How can he possibly know that when his mom died, his father was all he had left? How can he possibly know that in the back of a motherless, loner child's mind the more his father repulsed him as his own flesh and blood the more Connor craved his acceptance? Jude can't know what it's like to sit at the kitchen table and be addressed purely to pass the salt or a napkin. The first time Adam actually hugged his son was when he was fifteen years old. Connor will always remember that day. His father has burst through the door with something close to a smile on his face, which raised some suspects in the back of Connor's mind. He approached his son to his desk, where he was diligently doing his homework and broke the news without beating around the bush, too much.

Connor stared at him dumbfounded, processing the words. “Mate. Marriage. _What?”_

Adam chuckled and Connor swore it sounded creepy and clarified. “Not now, son. As soon as you graduate from college.”

Connor knew that for an alpha, find a mate was a huge deal. It was part of their evolution, of their destiny so he just thought with the naive mind of an innocent fifteen-year-old boy, oblivious to what love even looks like. “Wow. He cares about me.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?” Adam's tensed expression broke into a wide smile, squeezing his son's shoulders.

“I mean, I was supposed to find a mate eventually, right? So I guess it's okay.”

_Clearly, Connor didn't even know what he was talking about._

“I'm so proud of you, son.” Adam beamed at him before hugging the shit out of him. Connor was honestly startled by the sudden gesture, leaning into his father embrace and not daring to let go for a very long time, knowing that it was going to be a one in a lifetime thing.

 

  
"I was too weak." Connor sighs, "As my father has always said, I'm an omega in the body of an Alpha."

"You just looked up to him. I mean, I get it.. he was your alpha. You had no motherly guidance and to him, you've been nothing more than his golden goose.”

"I'm sorry for accusing you of keeping our son from me. I mean, you _did_ keep him away from me but I also can guess it wasn't easy and I'm not in the position to judge you for it."

"Apologies accepted." Jude tells him with a quiet tone in his voice, borderline apologetic as he adds. "But I had no right to keep him away from you. I.. I did a terrible mistake and I wish I could take that back."

"I wish I Could take a lot of things back." Connor confesses, then his cheeks turn pink as he adds randomly. "I never kissed him, you know."

"Oh.." Jude doesn't really know how to respond to that but he'd lie if he said that it , _deep down_ , doesn't make him glad.

"I couldn't."

"Why?"

"Because there's been only one man I've only ever wanted to kiss and that's you."

Jude feels heat rising in his cheeks at Connor's confession, his heart racing a little bit in his chest. He hasn't kissed anyone either after Connor's departure but it scares him to dive into the conversation. They have a lot of things to work on and right now, going back to where they left is at the bottom of the list.

They are not teenagers anymore, they can't afford to make a wrong move not when Tommy is the biggest part of the equation.

"I want us to have a clean start." Jude's announcement surprises Connor to say the least. His face glows with a multitude of emotions as fear, excitement, gratitude.

Jude's heart is literally sinking down at the sole thought of shutting those emotions down with one, but very much needed, clarification, "But.. nothing like what you're thinking. I meant that as starting to introduce you to Tommy. You know, toe dipping in the whole parenting thing.”

"So what are you saying is--”

"I want to tell Tommy about you." Jude replies matter of factly. Connor blinks as to process the new bit of information, then he nods, clearing his throat.

"Just to be clear.. you want to introduce me as--"

"His father." Jude rushes to clarify, his voice soft but warning at the same time despite the smile that wants to break free at the adorable sight of Connor Stevens biting down to his bottom lip, as to fight back a smile.

"I want to introduce you as his dad. You're gonna spend some time with him, so to get to know each a bit. I won't object but Connor... If you screw this opportunity up.."

"I won't." Connor sounds pretty sure of himself, a whole new attitude emerging if you ask Jude. “I want to get to know my son.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

Jude doesn't allow Connor to put a foot out of the door, because well, for starters it's almost midnight and second of all, Connor looks still shaken by the most recent events of the day which Jude thinks it's safe to say, it's been beyond intense.

"You can sleep in Brandon's room."

Connor nods mind absently, not really feeling the strength to argue to that. He, for once, doesn't feel emotionally stable to drive himself.

"Thank you, Jude.." Connor looks like he's about to hug him, considering by the way his body suddenly moves forward, then he must have changed his mind, recalling a thing called boundaries and settles for a simple shoulder squeezing, which is awkward beyond belief to Jude.

"Umm."

Connor gives a weary, breathless laugh having figured exactly what Jude's thinking, on which he couldn't agree more.

Shaking his head a little bit, he admits, "Jesus. This is so fucking--"

"First rule, Stevens." Jude interrupts him with _fake_ authority dripping from his voice and a small smile playing on his lips. "No swearing when the baby is around, _under any circumstances_."

Connor gets it. He nods his head, "Okay. That sounds fair. I get it."

Jude nods as in agreement, then he leads the way through the rails of stairs. Connor trails after him until Jude comes to a stop to a closed door which he assumes it's Brandon's old room. He quietly opens the door and then he tip-toes inside gesturing Connor to tag him along. Connor steps inside and the sight of their baby sleeping peacefully in his bed makes his heart race in his chest as the comforting scent of home fills his senses. He spends a long moment without uttering a single word because, after everything they've come across, words seem just futile. They just stare at the sleeping boy in complete astonishment and Connor spares one moment to steal a quick looks to the man standing next to him.

His heart aches as being met by the expression he sees on Jude's face, looking like someone that wouldn't _need_ or _want_ anything more than this to make him happy. Connor's just adjusting to the feeling but he can tell that this is what it was supposed to be theirs all along.

Jude dislodges his fond gaze from Tommy's peaceful figure. A smile wide on his lips as he whispers quietly, "It took me _weeks_ to convince him to sleep all alone in this bed."

Connor's throat suddenly closes up because this sounds like a memory he would have wanted to remember. He tries to keep his expression steady, happy to have the chance to remember all of the future memories since Jude wants him to get acquainted with their son.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah.” Jude chuckles, shaking his head a bit. Probably reminiscing over the memory. “It was a tragedy to make him abandon his crib. I got rid of it saying that Santa took it."

It actually makes Connor smile, just imaging Jude reaching the maximum level of desperation that pushed him into coming up with such excuse.

"That was a truly lame excuse, Jude." Connor chuckles quietly, covering his mouth with his hand.

Jude blushes a bit as he breathes out, "I know.. I know but look, he just kept _crying_ over his crib at night and I had to come up with something critical okay? I was desperate! When I told him, he looked at me and mumbled, 'Why, Dad?" With those _eyes_ and that _little voice_.. you'll see for yourself! You will not be able to deny him anything! Anyway, I had to come up with a believable reason because he looked so _disappointed_ and ready to burst into tears once again so I just blurted out the first thing that crossed my mind at the moment."

"Which was?" Connor prompts him by giving a laugh, quiet enough to not wake the baby up.

Jude bites down his bottom lip as he admits, "That Santa needed it back because his bed just broke."

Connor has to bite on his lip as well, the only way to hold back the laughter that wants to escape, Jude's murderous glare being thrown in his way does help his case a little bit.

"That's so--"

"Stupid. I know, but he's a baby.. he doesn't need to believe that Santa _doesn't actually_ fit in his crib. Besides, it worked.”

"I.. guess?” Connor says with a smile on his lips, then he lets his gaze to fall on the little boy, peacefully sleeping. His head is the only body part visible from over the blanket covering his whole frame, his thumb stuck in his mouth as he gives some soft puffs of air through his nose.

His hand itches to touch that strand of hair fallen over his eyebrow, but being too timorous to wake him up, he just resists his urge. Jude must have noticed the slight motion of his hand, lifting then falling back to his side, because he tells him, "You can touch his hair if you want."

Connor's eyes flicker to Jude's face, searching for hesitation but what he finds is Jude's smile, soft and caring and something breaks in his chest, a rush of vulnerability flashing across his features make Jude insist. "Connor, Do it."

Connor gives a nod of his head, unable to form words as he kneels down just across from him. His heart races at the proximity between them, it only takes one move of his hand to touch Tommy's puffy cheek but something makes him falter.

"What if he wakes up?"

"He won't." Jude insists, "He's a heavy sleeper."

"Okay." Connor gives a shaky breath before reaching down for his cheek. He touches the warn expanse of skin and it feels so soft beneath his touch.

“Can I ask you something?" Jude's voice makes him look up, staring into his eyes, currently flooding with curiosity.

"Sure.."

"How did you figure he was yours? Huh, what I mean is.. _he is_ yours, of course but how did you--"

"He looks like me.." Connor doesn't miss a beat as he tells him, "His eyes and his hair.. but his scent.. I don't know. I know it's weird since I never met him, but he reeks of me. Of us, together."

"He's always remembered me of _you_ not only because of his wild, sandy hair and hazel eyes but for the way he acts, sometimes. His stubbornness, his vitality, his strenght.. he's so yours. I'll show you some pictures of him as a newborn, one of these days.. ."

Connor's fingers freeze on the ministration over Tommy's hair and in addition to the pang of loss in his chest at the reminder that he wasn't there to see his son being brought to life, the fact that Jude is considering him to be part of their lives, that Jude is not going to keep him from being a parent to Tommy, brings his heart back to its entirety, feeling whole and beating again.

"Thank you." Connor whispers, sounding a bit breathless for all the right reasons. "Thank you for allowing me to be part of your lives.."

Jude's eyes fill with something along _calm_ and _regret_ and _hope_ which kind of gives everything away about what he's thinking.

That's probably why Jude just smiles softly at him, communicating with his the force of his gaze how sorry he is and how badly he wants to make this work between them and something in his gaze tells Connor that he truly believes in him but on that, Connor's not 100% sure.

 

 

Jude lets out a groan, rolling on his side of the bed. He checks the time on his phone and another groan escapes his lips. It's barely 6 am.

He closes his eyes again with the purpose to get some more sleep before his human clock alarm startles him awake but apparently, his bladder's clearly not on board with that plan.

He gets out of bed, almost stumbling over his slippers. He makes his way out of the room, rubbing his sleepy eyes and stops in his tracks, just before walking past Brandon's room. He frowns because the door is open and apparently, he's not the only one awake.

Connor's voice is audible through the slot of the door as he talks on the phone to someone.

"No. I told you. I don't want to hear any of this shit, okay?"

Jude's heart skips beats as hears Connor say, "We'll talk. Okay. I'll come over, later and we'll talk. No, it's not something we can talk over the phone."

 

He strides ahead to the bathroom and he does the least necessary noises in order to not wake Tommy up this his early, when it slums it shut behind his back. He takes a piss and then he sits down on the toilet. He spends more time than he probably should have in the bathroom, his mind spinning with thoughts and fears about introducing Connor to Tommy, that honestly didn't even take place in his head before listening to Connor talking to Preston --because it must have been Preston on the phone, calling his fiancè and being rightfully freaked out about Connor suddenly gone MIA. He shakes those thoughts off his head, decides he's done enough mistakes.

Connor and Tommy deserve to have the chance to connect as father and son like they should have. Preston or not, he's not going to screw it up for them, this time.

It's the right decision.

  
He decides he's spent enough time sitting on the toilet for the day besides, Since it's Sunday Jude can afford to spend another hour or so in bed, he thinks.

He walks out of the bathroom and on his way to his bedroom and he just _casually_ peeks into Brandon's room. It's just a reflex of course. Besides, the door is open. Plus, Connor's probably got back go sleep. Not a big deal if he just glances inside, right? But then, as he gets a glimpse of someone that _should have been_ asleep he's indeed fully awake, his heart almost rises up his throat in horror.

Tommy is standing there, eyes big and curious staring at this _stranger_ sleeping in Brandon's bed. Then as his hand lifts in the air, Jude's eyes go wide with horror knowing that nothing good ever comes when Tommy's this close to someone's hair.

“Tommy! No!”

But it's too late.

A lot of things happen in two and half seconds.

Tommy takes a handful of Connor's hair and starts _pulling_ at it, causing the man to jerk awake on a dishuman shriek of pain that, of course, startles the baby, whose only purpose was to play with Connor's hair, and makes him cry.

Connor coos at him, murmuring muffled apologizes while Jude crouches down across from Tommy, holding the crying boy against his chest, kissing his hair.

Jude's eyes find Connor's from over Tommy's head, an apologetic look on his face as he murmurs quietly, “I'm sorry... I should have told you he has this thing for people's hair!”

 


	5. Chapter 5

They are sitting on the couch, the three of them. Connor stills looks a bit shaken by the rough awakening but he can't possibly keep the smile at bay because his son is sitting on Jude's lap, his eyes crafty and curious as he flickers them from Jude's to Connor's face.

"Okay, Buddy.. I.. I want you to meet someone.."

Tommy looks up, tracing his tiny hand over Jude's cheek.

"Remember when you asked me why Margaret had two parents?"

"Yup." Tommy says with a wet popping sound. Jude's gaze search for Connor's as for moral support because as much as he's been practiced in the back of his mind this kind of conversation many times throughout the part few years, it doesn't make it easier to actually verbalize it.

"And I told you that your dad's not with you but he'd really want to be?"

"Yes!" Tommy shrieks brightly.

Jude's throat closes up, unable to finish the sentence because everything he thought was never going to happen, it's happening and right now, there are just too many emotions to deal with and not to mention, the guilt growing on his chest heavier when he's met by Tommy's happy laugh..

"I'm your dad."

Tommy's face turns to look straight at Connor, his nose scrunching up in confusion.

"Yes." Jude breathes out, feeling the sensation of tears tingling at the corner of his eyes. He hugs his son to his chest, murmuring feebly in his hair, " _Daddy's home._ "

Tommy's eyes stares up to Jude's and it only takes one look into those innocent hazel eyes, shining with joyfulness for the news that the dad he's never met is finally home to _see him_ , breaks something into Jude's chest that makes him hard to breathe. Jude reaches a point in which it's impossible to fight back tears any longer but what surprises him the most is the way Tommy follows along, burying his face into the crook of his neck, his tiny hands clutching around the fabric of his shirt.

"No.. no, no, love. Don't cry."

Tommy balls his fist into the fabric of Jude's shirt as he cries, his tears causing the shirt to get completely soaked. Connor's breath catches in his throat at the scene unfolding before his eyes.

Unlike from Jude, he has never had to imagine such a scenario to happen but if he were in Jude's shoes, he'd do the exact same thing; bawling his eyes out of happiness.

"Can I?"

Jude sniffs as he nods his head, then he asks Tommy, softly. "His name is Connor and he really wants to give you a hug. Can you do that? Give _dad_ a hug?"

Tommy nods vehemently crawling away from Jude's lap. Jude stares with wide eyes at the scene, the way Tommy immediately opens his tiny arms and Connor's long arms wrapping around his small frame, pulling him into a hug.  
His heart aches so much in his chest that it might explode in any seconds at the presence of tears gathering at the corner of Connor's eyes when he pulls their son even tighter against his chest. The way he rests his head on the top of Tommy's and his nostrils flare, breathing in Tommy's scent.

"You're so beautiful-- I'm sorry, I just.. I never could imagine this to happen."

"It's okay." Jude tells him, smiling through the haze of tears, clouding his sight.

"Just live in the moment."  
Connor gives a nod, then he just lets his eyes to fall close, pretending for a moment that all the previous years never happened.

Jude wipes away some tears with the back of his sleeve as he brushes his fingers through their son's hair. He gives a wet laugh of exhilaration when he sees Tommy wrap his tiny arms around his father's neck.

"I'll make some breakfast." Jude announces, deciding to give the two boys some privacy. "Do you want some coffee?"

"Yes, please." Connor smiles, looking down at Tommy's hand clutched around the hem of his shirt and kind of holding on.

Jude leans in and for a moment Connor's breath hitches in surprise because he's sure Jude's going to kiss him, but then, much to his chagrin, he just leans down to press a kiss on Tommy's head.

 

\---

"I have to go.."

Jude just makes an _Oh_ noise from the back of his throat, pretending to sound completely surprised by the news.

"But I was thinking that you could come over with Tommy, tonight."

Jude's so not comfortable with the idea and his face does a pretty terrible job at hiding his emotions because Connor cares to remark, "I live on my own. No Preston or Adam. I promise."

Jude bites the inside of his cheek, deciding to pick the following words very carefully, in a way to clear any undiscussed topics left in their 'agreement.'

"I got no problems with Preston. At all. You could as well ask him to come over."

Jude kind of wants to stab himself in the eyes with the fork laying in the sink, because the last thing he wants is to catch up with the boy that's supposed to spend the rest of his life with Connor but on the other hand, he's made it clear to Connor that he was going to let him be a part of their lives as parent. Nothing more. He couldn't handle another heart break, this time.

"What?"

Jude turns around to wash the rest of the dishes in the sink, his back facing Connor as he tells him. "Yeah, I mean.. He's your still your fiancè and it'd be rude to leave him out, completely. Don't you think?"

"Are you serious, right now?" Connor snorts, sounding thoroughly _amused_ by Jude's suggestion.

"I'm going to see him, this morning and I'm going to call it off. _All of it._ The wedding, the agreement, my father can suck my ass and fire me from his company as well. I'm done with it, Jude."

Those words said with such determination make his heart race in his chest against his own will. Those are the words Jude has expected Connor to say a lot of time ago, before of all this mess happened and despite Jude's clearly _moved on_ from his romantic feelings towards him, it still fucking got to him.

“Do you seriously think your father is going to let you go? Like this?”

"I don't care."

"Sure you don't." Jude snorts.

"Jude, d-don't, okay?! I've changed. I'm ready to go through _flames_ for you and our son."

Jude's eyes flutter shut, refusing to let those promises to get to him because it's just what they are, promises, vain words. Jude has stopped to believe in words a lot of time ago. He wants facts, but aside from that. He doesn't want to get hurt once again so he needs to make a distinction in case Connor hasn't gotten the message yet.

"Okay, Connor. Let me get one thing straight. This has nothing to do with _us_ in a way that goes beyond the parenting relationship, okay? I'm not.. right now, I don't want to jump in any relationships."

"Okay." Connor tells him with a breathy voice, "I'll wait. I'm--"

"You're not even jumped out of your relationship. If you think you'd like to call everything off--"

"I do." Connor cuts him off sharply, his voice firm and lacking hesitation.

"Then do it. But do it because it's something you _want_. Not for me or for our son. Because regardless of whatever happens, life has proven to us that we weren't meant to be together, before. Don't forget that."

Connor shakes his head, as if in denial. What he says it's something that leaves a mark in Jude's life. Something he cannot just ignore, even if once again, _are just words._

"This time, I'll die before ever leaving you."

 

\---

  
"I'll see you tonight, then. Both of you." Connor says with a small smile playing over his lips, Jude just gives a little nod of his head walking him towards the door.

"Should I bring something?"

"Just yourself." Connor's smirk has the desired effect, it makes Jude blush under the piercing intensity of his gaze.

"Okay then."

Connor smiles, reaching for his hand and giving a light squeeze instead of settling for the awkward shoulder squeeze. It feels more natural, less forced but still awkward.

They'll get there, Connor thinks.

Jude opens the door, never looking away from Connor's blazing eyes and his heart nearly stops when he's met by the one and only Adam Stevens standing, once again, unattended and uninvited, to his door.

Luckily this time there's Connor with him, who promptly growls at his own father warning him to back the fuck off. Jude takes a moment to glance at the scarred face of the man, starting from his swollen lip to his black eyes and a visible scar on his cheek. The visual proof that Connor actually tried to murder this man in behalf of what he's done to him, sends his blood into icy creeps.

"You're not going to put one foot near Jude and our son, so you better get the fuck off before I dig your own grave _with your head_ in this very backyard."

"Look at you being so protective over _your little bastard_." Adam shakes his head amusedly, causing Connor's breath to get shallower, his eyes to get darken than his usual color.

Connor's about to jump his bones once again but the moment those words slip from Adam's mouth, Jude walks past Connor like a fury, "Excuse me?! How dare you refer to my--"

"Our." Connor corrects him.

 _"Our_ son as a bastard?!"

"Who says it's yours?" Adam says with calm, challenging tone in his voice.

"I say so!" Jude fires back.

"You were such a little omega with your heart broken, I bet you've been meeting with plenty of horny whores just like you in order to mend your poor little slutty heart."

"As if! That is none of your fucking business! Besides, I know for sure it's Connor's."

"Then do a damn paternity test." Adam smirks, "If it states that that little thing is Connor's, I'll leave the two of you alone and promote him as VP of the Stevens Enterprises."

"You gotta to be kidding me.." Connor gives a hollow laugh, rubbing his eyeballs for the nonsense spilling from Adam's bitter tongue. "I don't fucking care about your company. I'm not giving up on anything more because you say so! Besides, That little thing as you call him, has a name. It's Tommy and he's my son and I've missed enough milestones in his young life because of you! I'm not gonna miss any more so get the fuck off!"

"We should do it." Jude's words of resignment cause Connor's eyes to grow wide in puzzlement as they flicker to his own, checking for any signs of irony or sarcasm on his face but Jude looks deadly serious. He also looks discouraged and fucking tired of all the damn curve balls life enjoy throwing in their way.

"Jude, what? No! This is exactly what he wants! He wants to control our lives! Again!"

Jude doesn't listen to Connor's pleading words, he just glares at Adam with blank eyes, a tone of his voice that admits no objections.

"If we do this.. you gotta leave the hell of us alone. You hear me, Adam? I've been living through hell because of you and this.. this is the last drop. We'll do the fucking test but once this is over, you gotta leave us to live our lives, otherwise, I swear to God I'll fill for a restraining order."

Adam's smirk never fades away, looking pretty sure of himself as he shrugs his shoulders. "That's a Deal."

 

_Ten days later._

  
They're sitting in the metallic chairs of the hospital waiting area, for their results.

Jude's hand is being held by Connor's as his head rests against his shoulder.

"I hope the doctor gives us the results as fast as possible.”

"Me too." Connor sighs, raising his hand to his lips and kissing the knuckles in a mind absent gesture.

The sudden gesture sends shivers crawling up his spine.

He'd lie if he said that he hasn't enjoyed and missed the sensation of Connor's soft lips making any kind of contact with his skin.

"Sorry. I thought--"

"It's okay, Connor." Jude cuts him off without looking away from the closed door of the doctor's office. "It helped to calm my nerves.. just a little bit."

Connor can't help but smile at that admission, his chest filling with warmth.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." Jude confirms, letting out a little yawn.

"Are you tired?"

"I haven't slept last night."

"Jude.."

"I know, okay? It's just.. I couldn't wait for his day to come."

"I know the feeling.. I can't wait for this to be over."

" _I can't wait for this to get started_."

The door of doctor's Bernie study finally opens and the grip Connor has on Jude's hand just becomes firmer, tighter with every step the doctor makes in their way, their eyes flickering to the white envelope he's holding in his hand which will contain their results.

Jude smiles.

He can't bring himself not to; He's confident in the result of the test and in the hope of a brand new day for them to come, but fate has proven to be a gigantic bitch to them and so are the results which affirm, in black and white, that Connor Stevens _is not_ Tommy's biological father.


	6. Chapter 6.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Make sure to read chapter 5 before this one since they have been updated in a row.

They both stares at the results in total jack-slacked _shock_ as to wait, somehow, for the result to magically translate into the intended outcome but _no_. It doesn't matter how long they spend just staring at the piece of paper, the answer it's always the same.

"It's impossible..." Jude mutters under his breath, not even blinking once.

Connor gulps down saliva as he utters out the infamous question spinning through his mind. "I hate to ask this but have you slept with anyone after I left?"

Jude turns to glare at him with eyes narrowed severely as he spits out, “No! I.. I didn't even _kiss_ anyone!"

Going by the look that Connor sends in his way, Jude can tell that Connor's not completely convinced by his answer, "Jude, it's okay if you did... just tell me."

"Are you fucking kidding me, right now! I was already pregnant _even_ before you left!"

Connor murmurs an unintelligible question that makes Jude frown, “What was that?”

Connor sighs before asking, louder this time.

"Then have you slept with anyone _before_ I left?"

"Oh wait, do you mean in the remaining time between going to school and crawl back up to my room and cry for the rest of the day? _No_!"

"I'm sorry it's just-- how is this even possible?!"

Jude doesn't miss a beat as he answers that question as it's the most obvious thing in the world, "Your father must have assumed that I gave my ass away pretty easily after you left and bribed someone to fake these results!"

"Oh my God.." Connor groans, covering his face with his hands. How hasn't he thought about the possibility of that scenario to actually happen?

"He wants to mess up with your head and make you believe I cheated on you when we were together. He's so fucking--"

"We'll retake those tests." Connor tells him quietly, in a way to be heard only by Jude just in case any of Adam's spooks is around the corner. "I know Tommy is our son. I know he is. We'll talk to your moms and ask for a bit of advice. This is what we'll do.." Jude doesn't look at him, he just keeps staring at those pages and, as the familiar _fire_ starts burning right through him he stands up without even acknowledging that poor Connor is still sitting there, dumbfounded and distraught by the news just as much. He starts marching to the doors. He lets out a huge breath the moment he steps outside, a cool breeze of air blowing through his hair that actually feels good on his heated cheeks.

Jude's gaze is lost somewhere in the air when Connor approaches him from behind, his soft soothing voice reaching his ears.

"I know you're upset."

"I'm more than upset, I'm.. I can't fucking believe my life, right now." Jude spits out in a raging breath.

"We'll get through it."

Jude blinks back tears as he sucks a deep breath, aware that until Adam's around they will never find peace or feel safe, for that matters.

"I do seriously want to get rid of your father's presence, Connor. It makes me sick to even say this but considering what he's capable of, I won't be feeling safe until he's buried somewhere. I'm sorry. I know it's awful to say this but I don't feel safe."

"Jude, it's okay. I'll make sure you and Tommy are safe. I'll do whatever it takes to make that happen."

"I want him dead. I want him to leave us alone. I-- Jesus. I want him dead!"

Some people passing through just staring at them, in particular, startled by Jude's enraged outburst who's breathing sharply through his nose, his eyes filled with unleashed tears.

"Let's just move away."

Jude jerks around, his nose scrunched up in confusion, a hint of amusement clear in his eyes as he breathes out a weak, "W-what?"

"I know it's--"

"We can't." Jude tells him, shaking his head a bit, "We can't let him win."

"Connor.. I swear to God, it's always been you. I.. I haven't slept with anyone."

Connor can't bear the look of pain on Jude's face any longer. He takes him by his hand and pulls him into his arms.

"I believe you."

"It's yours. It's your son, I swear to God.. I'd never lie to you on this."

"I know, Jude. Shhh... hey." Jude looks up into his eyes and Connor's hand comes to cup his cheek, not even realizing how close they are to each other. "I promise I'll do anything to protect you both, okay?"

"Okay." Jude sniffs, letting out a small, wet laugh when Connor's thumb comes to wipe some tears from his cheeks.

 

\---

Several days later, Connor bursts into his father's office without even knocking on the door, marching to his desk without even deeming his father worthy of a greeting. It's Adam who, startled by the sudden noise of his door's office being slammed open, looks up from his computer with a look of absolute boredom on his face when he asks Connor,

"What brings you here to your father's presence?"

"I'll marry Preston."

Connor's words have the desired effect. His father's smirk turns into a genuine wince of surprise making him look like a actual human being for once in his life.

"What?"

"What?" Connor gives a humorless laugh, raising an eyebrow as he fires back, "Are you _tha_ t surprised?"

"What made you change your mind?"

Connor shrugs nonchalantly, walking towards the imponent glass block that overlooks the garden.

"I just want them to be safe." Connor exhales, his eyes lingering on a couple walking with their daughter in the middle of them, holding both of her parents' hands, shoving away the stabbing pain that's causing his heart to constrict in his chest.

"That's a pretty sound decision." Adam tells him with a smirk clear and loud in his voice.

"At one condition." Connor announces suddenly, turning around to throw a serious look in his father's way, whose eyes glimmer with interest at the _sweet threat_ filling Connor's words.

"Admit that you have something to do with those results."

Adam doesn't look too surprised by the sudden mention of the tests, which gives Connor the answer he was looking for, especially when Adam says with fake innocent dripping from that _dumpster_ of a mouth, "I have no idea what you're talking about, son... Don't tell me you're _that_ surprised that your whore has been slutting around in your absence."

Connor's fist clench to his side at the disrespectful way Adam talks about Jude but despite the urge flooding through him to bruise that other eye in a way to match the black one, he manages to mantain his composure. _He has_ to if he wants to look believable and most importantly if he wants to succeed in his plan.

"You want me to marry Preston so that you can finally get to discuss your partnership agreement with Preston's father. Was it the only clause in your deal with him right? Only if their two sons got engaged.."

"Cut to the chase, son. As you can see, I'm a busy man."

"I'll marry him, just... leave Jude and Tommy alone."

Adam rolls his eyes, groaning. "What makes you think I got any interest in tormenting your little slut and his child?"

Once again Adam is completely way out of line as he talks about Jude and the second time around Connor just can't refrain the vomit of words rising up his throat, "You did it for years! You kept us apart. You tried to bribe him to get an abortion because you couldn't stand the sole thought of the world knowing that Adam Stevens' son knotted up some San Diego _commoner_! Then, when the truth finally came out.. you just had to show up in the doctor's office with a check because let's face it, father. _That's kind of your signature move."_

"It's kind of cute how far you're willing to go in order to protect your little whore, son." Adam exhales with a bored edge in his voice, not even raising his eyes from his computer's screen. "Besides, what were even the odds of the test to turn out positive? Doctor Bernie is one of the _best_ doctors in the whole city."

Connor's breath catches in his throat for a moment, having to think about Grandma Tracy's feet in order to get the excitement in check.

He wets his lips, asking with fake surprise in his voice.

"How do you know it was Doctor Bernie?"

Adam freezes for like a second, then he lifts his eyes from his computer screen and meets the growing smirk flashing across Connor's features with each passing seconds.  
_There you go_ , Connor thinks. He takes advantage of the way his father looks completely caught off guard and decides to push for an answer, "I said, how do you know I was talking about doctor Bernie's office?"

"You said that."

Connor's smirk only widens, "No, I didn't."

 

Adam's face goes pale, the smug mask of confidence finally seems to crumble down.

"It amuses me, dad. How a man with such deep sense of forethrough like _you_ slipping over such a little detail like that."

Adam looks down at his hands, giving a nervous laugh.

"It was exactly what it was, son. It doesn't mean anything."

"Oh yeah, I guess you're right but it doesn't explain why you went to his house last night, at ten pm."

"You're following me now?" Adam's eyes widen in shocking amusement, "Trying to find some dirt on me, son?"

Connor shrugs his shoulders, a smug look of pride on his face as he says, "You know there's an inquiry revolving a certain Doctor Bernie accepting money in exhange of favors." Connor insists, his patience wearing out.

"Oh, really?" Adam raises an eyebrow as he comments with nonchalant tone, "Some people just can't get enough of money.."

"Some people just can't enough of waving checks.." Connor muses, a smirk spreading across his lips. "Anyway. Some agents are questioning that man, right in his moment. Someone sent an anonimous tip.. isn't it crazy?"

"Listen, son. I don't know what you think you're doing..."

"Do not call me son." Connor cuts him off harshly. The lightful amusement cleared off his voice. "You've lost your right to call me son when you tried to get rid of _my_ son."

Adam shakes his head as he can't believe the shit that Connor's causing to him, right now. How could he ever since he's never experienced to lose the only thing he ever wanted? Well, maybe he will.

When he'll break up with Preston, there will be no wedding. Without wedding, there will be no partnership and hopefully, Adam will pay for his mistakes, possibly in jail.

Adam's face turns crimson with rage, the vein pulsing on his forehead as he shouts in Connor's face, "He was going to ruin your future! Can't you see that? He's been back in your life for less than a month and look at you! Throwing your future in the dumpster! Okay, I probably shouldn't have tried to bribe him or _doctor Bernie_ but all I ever wanted was to give you a future worth of your name!"

 

Connor's smile couldn't get possibly any wider as he gives a loud, much-needed sigh or relief. Adam frowns at the happiness oozing from every pore but before having the chance to open his mouth, meaning to ask what the hell is he laughing at.

Connor's phone vibrates into his pocket. He pulls it out with a grin stretched across his face.

"Hello? Oh, hey officer Morgan." Connor bites on his lip, pacing across the room and feeling the piercing gaze of his father's eyes right on him throughout the whole time.

"Did you get the whole admission through the mic? Because I recorded it on my phone, just in case. Perfect. Alright, thanks officer."

Connor hangs up the phone, laughing slightly in perfect exhileration and shrugs his shoulders, "Cops are coming to take you to the police station.”

 

Jude's been standing outside the building for more than twenty-five minutes. His whole body quivering in anticipation of what was about to happen. Connor and he had been discussing the easiest quickiest way to get rid of Adam for good and since the doubt that Adam, considering his records, could have corrupted doctor Bernie with one of his infamous checks, they decided to try and force the admission out of Adam's mouth.

Jude hears the familiar sound of police sirens in the exact moment Connor strides out of the building. Jude's body move on his own accord as soon as he sees the calm smile stretched across Connor's face.

“I can't believe this.” Jude breathes out, with a lazy smile on his lips pulling Connor in a bones crushing hug. Connor lets out a strangled breath before wrapping his arms around his waist, keeping him close and reveling in the most intimate moment they've shared so far.  
“It's over.. It's.. you did it.” Connor looks down when he feels some wetness striking down his neck, taking awareness of Jude's tears of happiness spilling down his eyes.

“I did.” Connor confirms. He closes his eyes, just breathing in Jude's sweet scent. “I told you I would have done anything to keep you safe.”

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

Preston doesn't even blink when Connor announces his will to call off the engagement. He barely raises his eyes from his book and mutters a wry, "Cool."

"Cool?" Connor repeats the words with a pitch of amusement his voice, thinking _'Wow that went better than I expected.'_

When Preston finally deems him worthy of his attention, though, he realizes that _maybe_ he has accidentally verbalized that thought.

Once he utters those words out loud Preston looks at him, eyebrow raised and the corner of his lips quirking up in a half smirk. "I agreed to marry you because my father made me."

Connor knows it's the truth, besides, he's exactly what he's been putting through for the last years. He doesn't mean it to make it awkward, though, so he just laughs it off.

“This is something every guy wants to hear.”

Preston shrugs his shoulders as to say 'It's the truth' bringing his attention back to the book he's reading. Connor takes it as an indication that this is his cue so he just heads to the door, but before actually walking out of the room, Preston calls his name. Connor turns around, looking at the boy with a polite smile on his lips.

“Yes?”

"I'm happy for you." Preston says with something actually resembling a smile on his face.

"Thanks, Preston." Connor smiles, "Maybe sometimes you can meet Jude and Tommy if you want."

Preston snorts as he's just sucked a lemon in his mouth.

"Ahh.. umm. Sounds nice but I'm not a fan of kids drooling all over my designer clothes.”

Connor gives a laugh, shaking his head in amusement just as he's been expecting such a comeback from him. " _God Forbid._ Bye, Preston."

"Bye, Connor."

 

It takes way longer than Connor imagined to tear down all the walls Jude's been building around himself. Connor actually asked Jude out on a date _five times_ in the last four months, getting every single time a big, fat, painful 'No."

But Connor gets it. He really does, that's why Jude's attempts to _dad-zone him_ every single time always fail to discourage him from his purpose.

He's right on one hand. Reconnecting with the son,  he never knew he had, comes first _as it rightfully should_ , then talking about a more stable living arrangement for them comes second.

Connor can't possibly stay over at Jude's house every single night (Although his moms are enthusiastic to let him stay over.) and it's confusing for a baby of such a young age to be moved from pillar to post from Jude's moms' house to Connor's house. Then planning and _sticking_ to a schedule comes third.

"I can pick him up from pre-school and keep him with me at the office until the time you get out of work." Connor suggests.

"I don't want him to distract you from your duties.. you're the boss now." Jude tells him, looking quite hesitant.

Since Adam has gone to prison, the fate of the Stevens Enterprises fell in his hands. So Jude knows quite well how hard Connor has been working in the last few months and he really doesn't want to pile up another responsibility over his shoulders so he suggests, "Mariana will pick him up from pre-school and keep him until you get out of work then you can pick him up from her place and the two of you can come to pick me up from work. How does that sound?"

Jude's catching his breath and that sight makes Connor smile amusedly. He's been talking at some incredibly fast pace, murmuring the word 'Pick up.' More than necessary.

"Sounds perfect." Connor's really tempted to kiss Jude right now but he doesn't. Jude's still fighting this _inner battle_ against his feelings and Connor definitely knows better than push for what he knows, it only takes some time to happen.

There's no doubt Jude loves him. Connor can see that by the simplest things as the soft blush rising in his cheeks whenever Connor compliments him or when their hands come to grab popcorn from the same bowl during Friday's movie nights and their fingers accidentally brush against each other in the bowl and Jude does absolutely nothing to pull away... or when he leans against the door frame, whenever Connor reads Tommy a bedtime story thinking that Connor's completely oblivious to his presence, and stares at the two of them with smile of awe on his lips.. _or_ that time they went for grocery shopping and someone tried to hit on Connor, when Jude left him unsupervised for less than two minutes, by asking him, in his opinion what orange looked juicier to him.

Connor was about to excuse himself politely when he suddenly was walking backward, being dragged by Jude's hand on his wrist "There you are! I looked everywhere for you! Guess what? There's a Two for one offer on diapers, today! Come on, dad up and stock up!"

 

Connor's been sitting on the floor, his back resting against the titles of the bathroom as he waits and sighs and prays all the Goddamn Supreme forces in the sky.

Tommy's been sitting on the potty for about twelve minutes – Yes, Connor's been counting- with arms crossed against his chest and nasty pout on his lips.

“Come on..”

“No potty!”

Connor sighs, wondering where the hell he got that attitude from..

“You can't use diapers forever!” Connor groans in frustration at Tommy's impervious behavior to keep his diapers on until puberty.

“No potty!” Tommy insists, slamming his feet to the ground. Connor gives a humorless laugh, draping his hand across his face.

“Santa needs your diapers.. come on. Don't be selfish or he won't bring you any gifts this year. ” Connor tries the oldest trick in the book-- well, to be fair he just steals the idea from Jude and adds a treat in the mix.

God.

This couldn't go any worse.

Yet it does.

Especially when Tommy's lip start trembling, his eyes watering with tears, his cheeks all rosy and blotchy and when he lets out this high- pitched cry, slamming his fists in the air in synchrony with the swinging motion of his feet.

Connor's got a headache just staring at him, not knowing where to look, what to do, what to say.

He just gapes at air, basking in his self-destruction.

Then, of course, Jude has to show up at that exact moment with eyes blow wide and hands full of grocery bags.

“What's wrong? Why is he crying?”

Connor stares at him in complete disarray, his hair messed up by his fingers, eyes frightened and almost dilated.

Jude drops the bags and rushes to Tommy's side, making shushing sounds in his hair while he makes eye contact with Connor.

“You okay?”

  
“H-he started crying. I--”

Jude smiles.

“Why Jude's smiling?” Connor thinks, blinking few times. “This is a disaster!”

“Okay stop panicking.”  
“I'm not panicking.”

Connor was _so_ panicking.

“He's pooping,” Jude says, his voice filled with wonder and happiness and pride because their son is pooping in the potty for the first time!

“Seriously?” Connor asks him, wide-eyed and drained out of breath.

“Yes!” Jude beams, wiping away the wetness beneath Tommy's eyes and his cheeks. “Whatever you said or did. It worked!”

Connor just shrugs, then he clears his throat. “ _I told you_ I got everything under control.”

 

 

It happens around Christmas.

Connor still has to figure what changed in the last few days since he literally asked Jude on a date on Monday, but he honestly wants to keep doing this rather than rationalizing over what caused Jude to change his mind.

He'll probably gonna ask, just.. not today.

Right now, all Connor _sees_ and _feels_ and _hears_ is Jude. Jude's sweet scent. Jude's bright smile. Jude's adorable laugh. Jude's attire in those skinny jeans that highlights his pretty ass and that dark blue shirt that seems cut out for him. Jude's cheeks turning pink, fiddling with the hem of the jacket he's holding in his hands as he's still figuring out what to do with it.

Just Jude. He honestly doesn't need anything more, right now. If he had to die, right now, he'd die as a happy man because finally.. after all these years, that look of pure love is back in his eyes. 

“Jude? What's going on? Why are you dressed up like this?" and then, since Jude was literally waiting for him in the foyer, Connor asks him. “Were you waiting for me?”  
  
"I'm just wearing a shirt." Jude points out, biting back a smile. "I was wondering if your offer still stands.”  
  
"Which offer?" Jude rolls his eyes because Connor knows exactly what he's talking about. He can tell by the way he's completely unable to hold the smile at bay.

"You know which offer." Jude tells him, giving a nervous laugh as he finally decides to verbalize the question that Connor did nothing but repeat endlessly in the last few months.

"The date. Do you want to go out on a date?"  
  
"A date." Connor repeats the words with a smirk on his face as he's actually thinking about it.

Jude gives a sigh, raising his eyebrow in irritation because Connor is clearly taking some kind of pride at the flushing heat getting more and more evident on his cheeks and ears.

"You. Jude Adams Foster, who's been turning me down for _months_ , is asking me out on a date. Mph. So much for turning tables."   
  
"Look, I had to be sure." Jude tells him, then he adds in a low pitched tone almost as he's whispering to himself. "I _needed_ to be sure."  
  
"Of your feelings?"  
  
"No." Jude shakes his head, "I never doubted the way I felt about you. I just-- look. My priority was to make sure that you and Tommy caught up for all the time you've spent apart."  
  
"Obviously." Connor confirms with a nod of his head and a smile on his lips, grateful to Jude for having kept that ' _Because of me._ ' left unsaid and not vocalized this time, knowing how much it pisses Connor off to hear Jude remind to Connor, and himself, the terrible mistake he's made.

"I want us to be a family." Jude sighs, fiddling with his hands a little bit. Connor obsessively follows the move, "A _real_ family. I want to wake up next to you and go to sleep knowing you'll be there, by my side. I want to experience every single thing I've gone through on my own for the past few years but with you, this time."  
  
"I.. I want the same thing. God, Jude. I literally don't want anything more.”  
  
Jude finally looks up and blinks in surprise when he finds Connor's hand holding his own. Connor knows, going by the look on his face, that he's wondering when has he gotten so close.

  
"I needed to be sure because if we.." Jude trails off on a whimper, unable to even form the words but he needs them to be said. "If we ever fall apart once again, I'm not sure I'll be able to get back on my feet again."  
  
"There's no need to." Connor tells him, intertwining their fingers together. "We've gone through the worse that could ever happen to us and fate brought us back together. I can't promise you that there won't be any discussions or that we won't tell each other off but I can promise you that this time, nothing and no one will bring us apart."  
  
"It truly did." Jude leans into the soft touch of Connor's hand on his cheek, closing his eyes at the way that a simple touch can make him see stars behind his eyelids.  
  
"Jude.."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Please tell me I don't have to wait until our date is over to kiss you."  
  
Jude laughs at the genuine desperation filling Connor's words. He opens his eyes and bites down on his bottom lip, shaking his head a little bit and a playful light in his eyes, almost as he's getting his payback for the way Connor's been teasing him, earlier.

"Patience is a virtue."

Connor tilts his head to the side, an adorable pout on his lips that make Jude's heart stutter in his chest because, God. _He's so Tommy's father._

Jude's about to make a quip about Connor waiting for so long and then getting so worked up over few hours but Connor's mouth literally falls against his own and honestly? He's been dying to kiss him just as much.

Connor closes his eyes as he melts into the kiss, leaving out of the door anything that's not Jude and he, finally kissing each other after years apart. Going by the noises Jude makes against his mouth, Connor can tell that Jude's been missing this just as much. They kiss with  vigour, hands pulling at hair and grabbing roughly, not caring about such futile things as time or the necessity to breathe.

"Connor--"

Jude gives a low chuckle as he pulls away, brushing his lips against his lobe.

"The dinner reservation.."

"Fuck the dinner reservation." 

Jude laughs, his whole body shaking with thrills. "I'm actually hungry.."

Connor gives a loud sigh against his neck, lifting his eyes to Jude's.

"You do realize we were having a moment, right?"

Jude knows it pretty well, especially since  Connor's erection feels pretty hard against his thigh, "We can have a lot of moments, after dinner."

Connor still looks like he's just been deprived of his favorite cookie just before getting a bite of it, then he nods his head because as much as he'd like to strip Jude of all his clothes and take his sweet time in kissing and discovering every inch of skin, Jude also has a point; They have all the time in the world.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this fic! :)

**Author's Note:**

> Comments or kudos are always appreciated :)


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